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Fucking hell Cop who do you think you are Dave Lee Travis? New entry eh matey? Haaaaaaaaaaa. Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! There's no need to show off.

I don't know what she's said to you but I would ignore it. What I will say Patty is this, your daughter is a snitch. She threw a load of egg sandwiches at me yesterday and then had a go at me for not holding them! I didn't even know that I should have been holding them as she grabbed them out...

Classic episode curtinparloe, Hank Scorpio is tremendous. Written by Swartzwelder as well, the best writer on the staff. Best episode for me is Marge versus the Monorail, outstanding stuff and written by Conan O Brien. LOG film for me was pretty poor in that I actually only laughed properly...

It's never nice to hear anything like that. Shame. His films were gash though.

How about at work then, you lazy bastard. That 'cough' flared up again has it?

Top drawer that Paulo!

Sorry Finchy I couldn't tell what you were saying for all the semen in your mouth from sucking too much corporate cock. Hee hee. Come on you blues

Strawbs you fucking mongoloid skank, I get enough grief on here from people who know me. The last thing I need is you chirping in on the subject. I wouldn't mind but I'm the last person who would ever call anyone. You're really out of order! I think I love you. Are you a feeder? Because if...

I'm sorry, what? Even the nazi's would have trouble cracking that, and they had much better facilities than me. Right first stab...is it Sally Gunnell?

Videos? There's no intelligence there at all. That's what you get when you're up against 2 people with a combined age of 30...and one of them's 25. Okay then one more, then I promise I'll let you have the last laugh. Honestly you're such a child...it's probably the company you keep. Okay...

Fucking hell Cop that was weak after your previous efforts. The young lad must be tiring, it is past his bedtime. Actually the Macdonalds drive 'thu' bit was the best. He obviously can't spell either, give him a backhander...and that isn't a euphamism. I'm going to go and do what I like...

Ha haaaa. Top drawer. You still let small boys suck your winky. I'm not surprised you can't forget Cornwall...you got arrested for raping the coastguard's son, in my shade...you thought no-one could see. Good times...except for young Simon...I don't think he enjoyed himself at all. What was...

Right Cop, who's typing this shit for you? If it's young Igor you better tell him to stop, his mummy and daddy are looking for him. I bet you didn't tell him the truth about that strange tasting lollipop you had him sucking...whilst blindfolded. I can lose the weight....you can't stop the...

Outstanding that, very good. I'll never go back there. To be honest I didn't recognise myself as I've put a bit of weight on since then. You ginger fuckwit wiggy. I don't know what you're laughing at either cop, I'm surprised you can even type a reply, you fat handed bastard. You rent your...

They are bust actually. Probably the weirdest scales ever. I went from being lighter than wiggy before I got on them to being heavier than him when I was on them. They are his scales though, he knows how to manipulate them for his own ends. You'd think if they were wrong for me they must be...

Yeah that bit was too far fetched for me too wiggy. He always has to stretch the realm of possibility that bit too far. To be honest I stopped reading after that because when you start a review with such nonsense as this it's difficult to believe anything after that.

Wiggy have you been spying on me? Quality piccie that mate, funny as. I nearly spat my cornflakes out, I say cornflakes I actually mean my 3rd helping of my morning fry up. I always look worse during my downtimes in between scenes. Cop, you want to be quiet too, 3 of your fingers weigh more...

A stone? With your weight she must have used 5 cameras! And you a vegetarian. There's just no excuse for that. At least my obesity is only temporary. Top drawer yesterday, enjoyed myself. Although after what I did with Finchy I needed an immediate shower when I got home.

Many thanks for the christmas wishes dude. All the best to you and yours from me and mine. Have a great one.

My god there's some scope for amusement in this story isn't there? Ok...I'll start. I was going to volunteer some information until I saw the reward. 4 tickets to see the clarets? I'll keep my mouth shut. Cop you wanker.